Dear Bestest Auntie Julie,
The new gest be still heer an I hope she be able to stay a bit longer. She’s pretty nise akshully, if a little bossy. She already seemin a little less confuzled than wen she furst arrive…. I hab bin teachin her a few stuffs like “how to sofa.” Sum fings she still be lernin….. She be findin stairsies miyty tricksome. An she keep tryin to eat 2-legses foods! She not lyk motorbikefings or dark nites.
She bin tellin me a little about herself as we hab bin chattin a bit in between sleeps, walks, meals an the rest of our bizzy shedyool. She seem to be henjoyin her stay. Happarently her naym be now Holly…. HuMum seem mowst please wiv herself in dis regard per “festive seesun blah blah”. Iz all lost on Holly tho as she not know her naym yet BOL BOL! (I try not to laff at dis wen she is here as wuld be most unkind, but it duz amyooz.)
Mowst himportantly, she hab not yet tried to eat me kibbles, althow she hab tried stealing me favrit sofa space der cheeky fing.
She be mowst amyoosin in sum uvver ways too …. Keep tryin to go in rong gate on return from walkies an doing a stuck, did a massive stairsies stuck rite at der top and hanging on wiv clawsies to be reskyood, keeps gettin hup in der nite to clattery battery an eberyfin. (On that note I be goin to ask HuMum to chays up dat alarmyclock order again as cannot be doin wiv me byuwty sleep bein disturbedlike.) She be really rarrver ridicyoluss in wayz a dignifyd gentlehound as meself wuld never be.
Ennyways, all be well. I mite ask HuMum if this can be Holly’s forever home too, but dis will depend on wevver she steal me favrit end of der sofa dis ebening.
Hope yoos all well?
Wags, lubbs and leans (and Holly sends yoo sum slightly undigifyd and confyoozled but keen helicopter tails)